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Three Dramas by Bjornstjerne M. Bjornson

B >> Bjornstjerne M. Bjornson >> Three Dramas

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Hamar. And I don't like this one any better than the others.

Signe. Indeed!--Then I really think you had better order me one
yourself.

Hamar. Come to town with me, and I will!

Signe. Yes, mother--Hamar and I have made up our minds that
we must go back to town. [Note: There would be nothing contrary to
Norwegian ideas of propriety in Signe's proposal. In Norway an
engaged couple could travel alone; and the fiancée would go to stay
in the house of her future husband's relations.]

Mrs. Tjaelde. But you were there only a fortnight ago!

Hamar. And it is exactly a fortnight too long since we were there!

Mrs. Tjaelde. (thoughtfully). Now, what _can_ I order for dinner?

(VALBORG comes into sight on the verandah.)

Signe (turning round and seeing VALBORG). Enter Her Highness!

Hamar (turning round). Carrying a bouquet! Oho! I have seen it
before!

Signe. Have you? Did _you_ give it her?

Hamar. No; I was coming through the garden--and saw it on the table
in Valborg's summerhouse. Is it your birthday, Valborg?

Valborg. No.

Hamar. I thought not. Perhaps there is some other festivity to-day?

Valborg. No. (SIGNE suddenly bursts out laughing.)

Hamar. Why do you laugh?

Signe. Because I understand! Ha, ha, ha, ha!

Hamar. What do you understand?

Signe. Whose hands it is that have decked the altar! Ha, ha, ha!

Hamar. I suppose you think they were mine?

Signe. No, they were redder hands than yours! Ha, ha, ha, ha!
(VALBORG throws the bouquet down.) Oh, dear me, it doesn't do to
laugh so much in this heat. But it is delightful! To think he
should have hit upon that idea! Ha, ha, ha!

Hamar (laughing). Do you mean--?

Signe (laughing). Yes! You must know that Valborg--

Valborg. Signe!

Signe.--who has sent so many distinguished suitors about their
business, cannot escape from the attentions of a certain red pair
of hands--ha, ha, ha, ha!

Hamar. Do you mean Sannaes?

Signe. Yes! (Points out of the window.) There is the culprit! He is
waiting, Valborg, for you to come, in maiden meditation, with the
bouquet in your hands--as you came just now--

Mrs. Tjaelde. (getting up). No, it is your father he is waiting
for. Ah, he sees him now. (Goes out by the verandah.)

Signe. Yes, it really is father--riding a bay horse!

Hamar (getting up). On a bay horse! Let us go and say "how do
you do" to the bay horse!

Signe. N--o, no!

Hamar. You won't come and say "how do you do" to the bay horse? A
cavalry officer's wife must love horses next best to her husband.

Signe. And he his wife next best to his horses.

Hamar. What? Are you jealous of a horse?

Signe. Oh, I know very well you have never been so fond of me
as you are of horses.

Hamar. Come along! (Pulls her up out of her chair.)

Signe. But I don't feel the least interested in the bay horse.

Hamar. Very well, then, I will go alone!

Signe. No, I will come.

Hamar (to VALBORG). Won't you come and welcome the bay horse too?

Valborg. No, but I will go and welcome my father!

Signe (looking back, as she goes). Yes, of course--father as well.
(She and HAMAR go out.)

(VALBORG goes to the farthest window and stands looking out of it.
Her dress is the same colour as the long curtain, and a piece of
statuary and some flowers conceal her from any one entering the
room. SANNAES comes in, carrying a small saddle-bag and a cloak,
which he puts down on a chair behind the door. As he turns round
he sees the bouquet on the door.)

Sannaes. There it is! Has she dropped it by accident, or did she
throw it down? Never mind--she has had it in her hands. (Picks it
up, kisses it, and is going to take it away.)

Valborg (coming forward). Leave it alone!

Sannaes (dropping the bouquet). You here, Miss Valborg--? I
didn't see you--

Valborg. But I can see what you are after. How dare you presume
to think of persecuting me with your flowers and your--your red
hands? (He puts his hands behind his back.) How dare you make
me a laughing-stock to every one in the house, and I suppose to
every one in the town?

Sannaes. I--I--I--

Valborg. And what about me? Don't you think I deserve a little
consideration? You will be turned out of the house before long, if
you do not take care--! Now be quick and get away before the others
come in. (SANNAES turns away, holding his hands in front of him,
and goes out by the verandah to the right. At the same moment
TJAELDE is seen coming at the other end of the verandah, followed
by HAMAR and SIGNE.)

Tjaelde. Yes, it is a fine horse.

Hamar. Fine? I don't believe there is its equal in the country.

Tjaelde. I dare say. Did you notice that he hadn't turned a hair?

Hamar. What glorious lungs! And such a beauty, too--his head, his
legs, his neck--! I never saw such a beauty!

Tjaelde. Yes, he is a handsome beast. (Looks out of the verandah at
the yacht.) Have you been out for a sail?

Hamar. I was sailing among the islands last night, and came back
this morning with the fishing-boats--a delightful sail!

Tjaelde. I wish I had time to do that.

Hamar. But surely it is only imagination on your part, to think
that you never have time?

Tjaelde. Oh, well, perhaps I have time but not inclination.

Signe. And how do things stand where you have been?

Tjaelde. Badly.

Valborg (coming forward). Welcome home, father!

Tjaelde. Thank you, dear!

Hamar. Is it not possible to save anything?

Tjaelde. Not at present; that is why I took the horse.

Hamar. Then the bay horse is the only thing you get out of the
smash?

Tjaelde. Do you know that I might say that horse has cost me three
or four thousand pounds?

Hamar. Well, that is its only defect, anyway! Still, if the worst
comes to the worst, and you can afford it--the horse is priceless!
(TJAELDE turns away, puts down his hat and coat and takes off his
gloves.)

Signe. It is beautiful to see your enthusiasm when you talk about
horses. I rather think it is the only enthusiasm you have.

Hamar. Yes, if I were not a cavalry officer I should like to be a
horse!

Signe. Thank you! And what should I be?

Valborg. "Oh, were I but the saddle on thy back! Oh, were I but the
whip about thy loins!"

Hamar. "Oh, were I but the flowers in thy--." No, "hand" doesn't
rhyme!

Tjaelde. (coming forward, meets MRS. TJAELDE, who has come in from
the right.) Well, my dear, how are you?

Mrs. Tjaelde. Oh, I find it more and more difficult to get about.

Tjaelde. There is always something the matter with you, my dear!
Can I have something to eat?

Mrs. Tjaelde. Yes, it has been standing waiting for you. Here it
comes. (A maid brings in a tray which she lays on the table.)

Tjaelde. Good!

Mrs. Tjaelde. Will you have a cup of tea?

Tjaelde. No, thank you.

Mrs. Tjaelde. (sitting down beside him and pouring him out a glass
of wine). And how have things gone with the Möllers?

Tjaelde. Badly. I told you so already.

Mrs. Tjaelde. I didn't hear you.

Valborg. I had a letter to-day from Nanna Möller. She tells me all
about it--how none of the family knew anything about it till the
officers of the courts came.

Tjaelde. Yes, there must have been a dreadful scene.

Mrs. Tjaelde. Did he tell you anything about it?

Tjaelde (as he eats). I didn't speak to him.

Mrs. Tjaelde. My dear! Why, you are old friends!

Tjaelde. Bah! Old friends! He sat looking as if he had taken leave
of his senses. Besides, I have had enough of that family. I didn't
go there to hear them talk about their troubles.

Signe. I suppose it was all very sad?

Tjaelde (still eating). Shocking!

Mrs. Tjaelde. What will they have to live on?

Tjaelde. What is allowed them by their creditors, of course.

Signe. But all the things they had?

Tjaelde. Sold.

Signe. All those pretty things--their furniture, their carriages,
their--?

Tjaelde. All sold.

Hamar. And his watch? It is the most beautiful watch I have ever
seen--next to yours.

Tjaelde. It had to go, of course, being jewellery. Give me some
wine; I am hot and thirsty.

Signe. Poor things!

Mrs. Tjaelde. Where are they going to live now?

Tjaelde. In the house of one of the skippers of what was their
fleet. Two small rooms and a kitchen.

Signe. Two small rooms and a kitchen! (A pause.)

Mrs. Tjaelde. What do they intend to do?

Tjaelde. There was a subscription started to enable Mrs. Möller to
get the job of catering for the Club.

Mrs. Tjaelde. Is the poor woman going to have more cooking to do!

Signe. Did they send no messages to us?

Tjaelde. Of course they did; but I didn't pay any attention to
them.

Hamar (who has been standing on the verandah). But Möller--what
did he say? What did he do?

Tjaelde. I don't know, I tell you.

Valborg (who has been walking up and down the room during the
preceding conversation). He has said and done quite enough already.

Tjaelde (who has at last finished eating and drinking, is struck by
her words). What do you mean by that, Valborg?

Valborg. That if I were his daughter I would never forgive him.

Mrs. Tjaelde. My dear Valborg, don't say such things!

Valborg. I mean it! A man who would bring such shame and misery
upon his family does not deserve any mercy from them.

Mrs. Tjaelde. We are all in need of mercy.

Valborg. In one sense, yes. But what I mean is that I could never
give him my respect or my affection again. He would have wronged me
too cruelly.

Tjaelde (getting up). Wronged you?

Mrs. Tjaelde. Have you finished already, dear?

Tjaelde. Yes.

Mrs. Tjaelde. No more wine?

Tjaelde. I said I had finished. Wronged you? How?

Valborg. Well, I cannot imagine how one could be more cruelly
wronged than to be allowed to assume a position that was nothing
but a lie, to live up to means that had no real existence but were
merely a sham--one's clothes a lie, one's very existence a lie!
Suppose I were the sort of girl that found a certain delight in
making use of her position as a rich man's daughter--in using it to
the fullest possible extent; well, when I discovered that all that
my father had given me was stolen-that all he had made me believe
in was a lie--I am sure that then my anger and my shame would be
beyond all bounds!

Mrs. Tjaelde. My child, you have never been tried. You don't know
how such things may happen. You don't really know what you are
saying!

Hamar. Well it might do Möller good if he heard what she says!

Valborg. He has heard it. His daughter said that to him.

Mrs. Tjaelde. His own daughter! Child, child, is that what you
write to each other about? God forgive you both!

Valborg. Oh, He will forgive us, because we speak the truth.

Mrs. Tialde. Child, child!

Tjaelde. You evidently don't understand what business is--success
one day and failure the next.

Valborg. No one will ever persuade me that business is a lottery.

Tjaelde. No, a sound business is not.

Valborg. Exactly. It is the unsound sort that I condemn.

Tjaelde. Still, even the soundest have their anxious moments.

Valborg. If the anxious moments really foreshadow a crisis, no man
of honour would keep his family o: his creditors in ignorance of
the fact. My God, how Mr. Möller has deceived his!

Signe. Valborg is always talking about business!

Valborg. Yes, it has had an attraction for me ever since I was a
child. I am not ashamed of that.

Signe. You think you know all about it, anyway.

Valborg. Oh, no; but you can easily get to know a little about
anything you are fond of.

Hamar. And one would need no great knowledge of business to condemn
the way Möller went on. It was obvious to every one. And the way
his family went on, too! Who went the pace as much as the Möllers?
Think of his daughter's toilettes!

Valborg. His daughter is my best friend. I don't want to hear her
abused.

Hamar. Your Highness will admit that it is possible to be the
daughter of a _very_ rich man without being as proud and as vain
as--as the lady I am not allowed to mention!

Valborg. Nanna is neither proud nor vain. She is absolutely
genuine. She had the aptitude for being exactly what she thought
she was--a rich man's daughter.

Hamar. Has she the "aptitude" for being a bankrupt's daughter
now?

Valborg. Certainly. She has sold all her trinkets, her dresses--
every single thing she had. What she wears, she has either paid for
herself or obtained by promising future payment.

Hamar. May I ask if she kept her stockings?

Valborg. She sent everything to a sale.

Hamar. If I had known that I would certainly have attended it!

Valborg. Yes, I daresay there was plenty to make fun of, and
plenty of idle loafers, too, who were not ashamed to do so.

Mrs. Tjaelde. Children, children!

Hamar. May I ask if Miss Nanna sent her own idleness to the sale
with her other effects?--because I have never known any one with a
finer supply of it!

Valborg. She never thought she would need to work.

Tjaelde (coming forward to VALBORG). To take up the thread of what
we were saying: you don't understand what a business-man's hope is
from one day to the other--always a renewed hope. That fact does
not make him a swindler. He may be unduly sanguine, perhaps--a
poet, if you like, who lives in a world of dreams--or he may be a
real genius, who sees land ahead when no one else suspects it.

Valborg. I don't think I misunderstand the real state of affairs.
But perhaps you do, father. Because is not what you call hope,
poetry, genius, merely speculating with what belongs to others,
when a man knows that he owes more than he has got?

Tjaelde. It may be very difficult to be certain even whether he
does that or not.

Valborg. Really? I should have thought his books would tell him--

Tjaelde. About his assets and his liabilities, certainly. But
values are fluctuating things; and he may always have in hand some
venture which, though it cannot be specified, may alter the whole
situation.

Valborg. If he undeniably owes more than he possesses, any venture
he undertakes must be a speculation with other people's money.

Tjaelde. Well--perhaps that is so; but that does not mean that he
steals the money--he only uses it in trust for them.

Valborg. Entrusted to him on the false supposition that he is
solvent.

Tjaelde. But possibly that money may save the whole situation.

Valborg. That does not alter the fact that he has got the use of it
by a lie.

Tjaelde. You use very harsh terms. (MRS. TJAELDE has once or twice
been making signs to VALBORG, which the latter sees but pays no
attention to.)

Valborg. In that case the lie consists in the concealment.

Tjaelde. But what do you want him to do? To lay all his cards on
the table, and so ruin both himself and the others?

Valborg. Yes, he ought to take every one concerned into his
confidence.

Tjaelde. Bah! In that case we should see a thousand failures every
year, and fortunes lost one after the other everywhere! No, you
have a level head, Valborg, but your ideas are narrow. Look here,
where are the newspapers? (SIGNE, who has been talking confidentially
to HAMAR on the verandah, comes forward.)

Signe. I took them down to your office. I did not know you meant to
stay in here.

Tjaelde. Oh, bother the office! Please fetch them for me. (SIGNE
goes out, followed by Hamar.)

Mrs. Tjaelde (in an undertone to VALBORG). Why will you never
listen to your mother, Valborg? (VALBORG goes out to the verandah;
leans on the edge of it, with her head on her hands, and looks
out.)

Tjaelde. I think I will change my coat. Oh no, I will wait till
dinner-time.

Mrs. Tjaelde. Dinner! And here I am still sitting here!

Tjaelde. Are we expecting any one?

Mrs. Tjaelde. Yes, have you forgotten?

Tjaelde. Of course, yes.

Mrs. Tjaelde (going out). What on earth am I to order?

(TJAELDE comes forward as soon as he is alone, sits down on a chair
with a weary, harassed expression, and buries his face in his hands
with a sigh. SIGNE and HAMAR come back, she carrying some
newspapers. HAMAR is going out to the verandah again, but SIGNE
pulls him back.)

Signe. Here you are, father. Here are--

Tjaelde. What? Who?

Signe (astonished). The newspapers.

Tjaelde. Ah, yes. Give them to me.(Opens them hurriedly. They are
mostly foreign papers, in which he scans the money articles one
after another.)

Signe (after a whispered conversation with HAMAR). Father!

Tjaelde (without looking up from the papers).Well? (To himself,
gloomily.) Down again, always down!

Signe. Hamar and I want so much to go into town again to Aunt
Ulla's.

Tjaelde. But you know you were there only a fortnight ago. I
received your bills yesterday. Have you seen them?

Signe. No need for that, father, if _you_ have seen them! Why do
you sigh?

Tjaelde. Oh--because I see that stocks keep falling.

Signe. Pooh! Why should you bother about that? Now you are sighing
again. I am sure you know how horrid it is for those you love not
to have what they want. You won't be so unkind to us, father?

Tjaelde. No, my child, it can't be done.

Signe. Why?

Tjaelde. Because--because--well, because now that it is summer time
so many people will be coming here whom we shall have to entertain.

Signe. But entertaining people is the most tiresome thing I know,
and Hamar agrees with me.

Tjaelde. Don't you think I have to do tiresome things sometimes,
my girl?

Signe. Father dear, why are you talking so solemnly and
ceremoniously? It sounds quite funny from you!

Tjaelde. Seriously, my child, it is by no means an unimportant
matter for a big business house like ours, with such a wide-spread
connection, that people coming here from all quarters should find
themselves hospitably received. You might do that much for me.

Signe. Hamar and I will never have a moment alone at that rate.

Tjaelde. I think you mostly squabble when you are alone.

Signe. Squabble? That is a very ugly word, father.

Tjaelde. Besides, you would be no more alone if you were in town.

Signe. Oh, but it is quite different there!

Tjaelde. So I should think--from the way you throw your money
about!

Signe (laughing). Throw our money about! What else have we to do?
Isn't that what we are for? Daddy, listen--dear old dad--

Tjaelde. No, dear--no.

Signe. You have never been so horrid to me before.

Hamar (who has been making signs to her to stop, whispers). Can't
you be quiet! Don't you see he is put out about something?

Signe (whispering). Well, you might have backed me up a little.

Hamar (as before). No, I am a bit wiser than you.

Signe (as before). You have been so odd lately. I am sure I don't
know what you want?

Hamar (as before). Oh, well, it doesn't matter now--because I am
going to town alone.

Signe (as before). What are you going to do?

Hamar (going). I am going to town alone. I am sick of this!

Signe (following him). Just you try! (Both go out by the verandah,
to the right. TJAELDE lets the newspapers fall out of his hands
with a heavy sigh.)

Valborg (looking in from the verandah). Father! (TJAELDE starts.)
There goes Mr. Berent, the lawyer from Christiania.

Tjaelde (getting up). Berent? Where? On the wharf?

Valborg. Yes. (Comes back into the room. TJAELDE looks out of the
window.) The reason I told you was because I saw him yesterday at
the timber-yard, and a little while before that, at the brewery and
at the works.

Tjaelde (to himself). What can that mean? (Aloud.) Oh, I know he is
very fond of making little trips to all sorts of places in the
summer. This year he has come here--and no doubt he likes to see
the chief industries of the place. There is not much else here to
see! But are you sure it is he? I think--

Valborg (looking out). Yes, it is he. Look now, you know his walk--

Tjaelde. --and his trick of crossing his feet--yes, it is he. It
looks as if he were coming here.

Valborg. No, he has turned away.

Tjaelde. All the better! (To himself, thoughtfully.) Could it
possibly mean--? (SANNAES comes in from the right.)

Sannaes. Am I disturbing you, sir?

Tjaelde. Is that you, Sannaes? (SANNAES, as he comes forward, sees
VALBORG standing by the farther window. He appears frightened and
hides his hands quickly behind his back.) What do you want?
(VALBORG looks at SANNAES, then goes on to the verandah and out to
the right.) What is it, man? What the deuce are you standing there
for?

Sannaes (bringing his hands from behind his back as soon as VALBORG
has passed him, and looking after her.) I didn't like to ask you,
before Miss Valborg, whether you are coming down to your office
to-day or not.

Tjaelde. Have you gone mad? Why on earth shouldn't you ask me that
before Miss Valborg?

Sannaes. I mean that--if not--I should like to speak to you here,
if it is convenient.

Tjaelde. Look here, Sannaes, you ought to try and get rid of your
shyness; it doesn't suit a business man. A business man should be
smart and active, and not let his wits go wool-gathering because he
finds himself in the same room with a woman. I have often noticed
it in you.--Now, what is it? Out with it!

Sannaes. You are not coming to the office this morning, sir?

Tjaelde. No, there is no post goes out before this evening.

Sannaes. No. But there are some bills of exchange--

Tjaelde. Bills? No.

Sannaes. Yes, sir--that fourth one of Möller's that was protested,
and the big English one.

Tjaelde (angrily). Have they not been met yet? What does this mean?

Sannaes. The manager of the bank wanted to see you first, sir!

Tjaelde. Have you gone crazy--? (Collects himself.) There must be
some misunderstanding, Sannaes.

Sannaes. That is what I thought; so I spoke about it to the chief
clerk, and to Mr. Holst as well.

Tjaelde. And Mr. Holst said--?

Sannaes. The same thing.

Tjaelde (walking up and down). I will go and see him--or rather, I
_won't_ go and see him; because this is evidently something that--.
We have some days' grace yet, haven't we?

Sannaes. Yes, sir.

Tjaelde. And still no telegram from Mr. Lind?

Sannaes. No, sir.

Tjaelde (to himself). I can't understand it. (Aloud.) We will
negotiate this matter direct with Christiania, Sannaes. That is
what we will do--and leave these little local banks alone in
future. That will do, Sannaes! (Makes a gesture of dismissal. Then
says to himself:) That damned Möller! It has made them all
suspicious! (Turns round and sees SANNAES still there.) What are
you waiting for?

Sannaes. It is settling day--and I have no money in the safe.

Tjaelde. No money in the safe! A big business like this, and
nothing in the safe on settling day! What kind of management is
that, I should like to know? Must I teach you the A B C of business
over and over again? One can never take a half day off, or hand
over the control! of the tiniest part of the business--! I have no
one, absolutely no one, that I can rely on! How have you let things
get into such a state?

Sannaes. Well, there was a third bill, which expired to-day--Holm
and Co., for £400. I had relied upon the bank, unfortunately--so
there was nothing for it but to empty the safe--here and at the
brewery as well.

Tjaelde (walking about restlessly). Hm--hm--hm!--Now, who can have
put that into Holst's head?--Very well, that will do. (Dismisses
SANNAES, who goes out but comes back immediately.)

Sannaes (whispering). Here is Mr. Berent!

Tjaelde (surprised). Coming here?

Sannaes. He is just coming up the steps! (Goes out by the further
door on the right.)

Tjaelde. (calls after him in a whisper). Send up some wine and
cakes!--It is just as I suspected! (Catches sight of himself in a
mirror.) Good Lord, how bad I look! (Turns away painfully from the
mirror; looks in it again, forces a smile to his face, and so,
smiling, goes towards the verandah, where BERENT is seen coming in
slowly from the left.)

Tjaelde (greeting BERENT politely but with reserve). I feel
honoured at receiving a visit from so distinguished a man.

Berent. Mr. Tjaelde, I believe?

Tjaelde. At your service! My eldest daughter has just been
telling me that she had seen you walking about my property.

Berent. Yes; an extensive property--and an extensive business.

Tjaelde. Too extensive, Mr. Berent. Too many-sided. But one thing
has led to another. Pray sit down.

Berent. Thank you; it is very warm to-day. (A maid brings in cakes
and wine, and puts them on the table.)

Tjaelde. Let me give you a glass of wine?

Berent. No, thank you.

Tjaelde. Or something to eat?

Berent. Nothing, thank you.

Tjaelde (taking out his cigar-case). May I offer you a cigar? I can
answer for their quality.

Berent. I am very fond of a good cigar. But for the moment I will
not take anything, thank you! (A pause. TJAELDE takes a seat.)

Tjaelde (in a quiet, confidential voice). Have you been long here,
Mr. Berent?

Berent. Only a day or two. You have been away, have you not?

Tjaelde. Yes--that unhappy affair of Mr. Möller's. A meeting of
creditors after the sale.

Berent. Times are hard just now.

Tjaelde. Extraordinarily so!

Berent. Do you think that Möller's failure will bring down any
more firms with it-besides those we know of already, I mean?

Tjaelde. I don't think so. His--his misfortune was an exceptional
case in every respect.

Berent. It has made the banks a little nervous, I hear.

Tjaelde. I dare say.

Berent. Of course you know the state of affairs here better than
any one.

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Theatre review: Three Women, Jermyn Street, London
Obituary: Prolific crime novelist, Oscar-nominated screenwriter and man of many pseudonyms

Climbing the walls

Barack Obama is teaming up with Spider-Man in a comic from Marvel, which will see the future president exchanging a fist-bump with the superhero. The story sees one of Spidey's oldest enemies, the Chameleon, trying to stop Obama being inaugurated. Spider-Man's alter ego, Peter Parker, is covering the event as a photographer, and saves the day.

"Ya hear that, Chameleon?" Spider-Man says as he thwacks the villain in the face. "The president-elect here just appointed me ... secretary of shuttin' you up."

He tells Obama: "This is your day, and I know it wouldn't look good to be seen palling around with me" - in a nod to Sarah Palin's comment that Obama had been "palling around with terrorists".

"When we heard that president-elect Obama is a collector of Spider-Man comics, we knew that these two historic figures had to meet in our comics' Marvel Universe," said the publisher's editor-in-chief, Joe Quesada.

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